It’s rare, actually, when someone attempts to sell you something that will bring you closer to yourself. So much of experience in consumerism-whether you’re worrying about whether you have enough money to buy basic goods like food, or worrying whether you have enough money to go on the same trip your friends are going on, or worrying whether you’re alpha enough or skinny enough to get an attractive woman or man to get naked with you-is trying to get access to something that extends the self, supplements or expands it, makes you more or different than you were before. When I told Blaine about this, he responded that it reminded him of amusement parks where you have to pay to get a copy of a picture of yourself on the ride. I have never seen a photograph of my own vulva, since I do not have one and have not had what other people sometimes call “the surgery,” in reference to vaginoplasty. Undeniable, through the blur, at the right height, where the hot dogs meet, is a beige-and-pink cleft, seemingly hairless. The pants I was wearing were wide-leg and the program renders my nude legs as exactly the width of the pants, making them perfect columns, more like uncooked hot dogs than legs. Somehow, in the nude version, there is some remaining black shape under where my wrists were, on my protected belly. I’m holding my hands over my stomach (a gesture I was once taught might signal that someone feels self-protective). I am being paywalled from seeing my own AI tits and pussy. First of all, it’s blurred, and you have to pay to un-blur it. The image that’s revealed hits me in the gut. I upload a mirror selfie of myself in black Yohji pants and a sleeveless mesh top, black bra underneath. I have, in fact, already seen myself naked.
Using AI, the program then redraws the same picture of her without clothes on. The so-called deepfake generator invites you to upload any image of a clothed woman.
MY FRIEND BLAINE sends me the link to a website boasting a heretofore unimaginable feat: See any girl naked.
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